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WHEN FIRST DIAGNOSED: UNDERSTANDING AND COMMUNICATING ABOUT
HIV-TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THE DIAGNOSIS: HOMOSEXUALITY
HIV
Anti-Infectives Probably the best way to resolve the estrangement is to talk about it. One Sunday, June began crying in church and had to leave: “My son followed me outside the church and said, ‘Don’t you still love me? Am I any different?’ I told him I wasn’t raised to understand gays. I said I didn’t understand it, and he said, ‘Mom, I didn’t choose my sexuality. And I don’t understand you and Dad either.’ What bothered me was that I’d miss his marriage and children, but that was just selfish. I had to take the parts of me that were my old beliefs and upbringing and set them aside. I had to come to terms with my son’s gayness.” Like many people, though, June continued to hope her son would change.
Steven’s cousin, who is his caregiver, knew Steven was gay: “She said she knew all along,” Steven said. “She’d change me if she could. But when I get tired of her arguing about it, I tell her.” Steven and his cousin, June and her son, like many others, discuss their differences, and if they do not understand each other, agree to let it be. No one in these relationships thinks their differences are as important as their bonds. “Loving is loving,” June said. “I’ve always loved my son. I would have a harder time not loving him than loving him.”
Discussion does not always lead to resolution, especially for gay or bisexual men and their wives. Sometimes a couple can discuss the husband’s sexuality openly. This sometimes results in divorce, sometimes in friendship, sometimes in an agreement that the man and woman will still help each other out. Other times, the couple has an unspoken agreement to ignore the husband’s sexuality; it remains his own private business, and no one asks questions. Sometimes, even after a diagnosis of AIDS, the husband denies that he is gay and the wife agrees to believe the denial. All these alternatives work; each couple decides what works best for them. The only resolution that is unhealthy is one in which one person is infected with HIV and the couple does not practice safer sex.
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